Bonehead Questions

The following are reported to be transcripts of what
people have actually said — verbatim — in a court of law.  I have no way of verifying these, but hey, levity is good
for the soul.

Q: The
youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?

Q: Were you present
when your picture was taken?

Q: Was it you or your younger
brother who was killed in the war?

Q: How far apart were the
vehicles at the time of the collision?

Q: You were there until
the time you left, is that true?

Q: How many times have you
committed suicide?

Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q:
How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?

Q:
You say the stairs went down to the basement?
A: Yes.
Q: And
these stairs, do they go up also?

Q: You went on a rather
elaborate honeymoon, didn’t you?
A: I went to Europe, sir.
Q: And
you took your new wife?

Q: How was your first marriage
terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?

Q:
Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A:
All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
Q: Do you recall the
time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30
p.m.
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was
sitting up on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.

—Various
Internet sources.

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Jeff Vankooten is a speaker and author focusing on the power of resilience to effectively engage the challenges of change. He helps leaders, businesses, and organizations develop the skills necessary to thrive in an increasingly unpredictable business environment.
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